Love in the Time of Canada

Did you know that in Toronto during the week, the TTC (Toronto Transit Commission) stops running at 1 a.m.? That means no buses, no trains. That means last night when Lucas, Erik, and I had our last drinks at 1:30 a.m. at Scotland Yard, I was stranded. Again.

Lucas offered to drive me home if I took a cab with him, but I told him I would rather crash on his couch. Even though the last time I did that I had the worst night's sleep ever - his couch is more of a loveseat and therefore about two feet too short to stretch out on. But I've learned that not coming home at all is better than coming home in the wee hours of the morning. I was actually really tired and ready to fall asleep the minute I sat down on his couch, but Lucas was feeling chatty. He showed me his Arabic copy of 1001 Nights (very beautiful book) and gave me Love in the Time of Cholera and some Michael Ondaatje book to read, which I can't remember the name of but is not The English Patient. I've always wanted to read Love in the Time of Cholera. It just sounds so ... weird. And I like Gael Garcia Marquez.

Then I saw he had a book on Hannah Arendt and said, "Oh, Hannah Arendt. The banality of evil." That comment just blew Lucas wide open. For the next two hours I heard all about Arendt, Heidegger, Eichmann, Nelson Mandela and Trudeau, the greatest Prime Minister Canada has ever seen and whose wife cuckolded him for the Rolling Stones and Studio 54, and also Michael Ignatieff, who is apparently going to be the downfall of Canada if he is elected Prime Minister. He even showed me pictures of Trudeau and his partying wife, Maggie. Finally I said, "Um, Lucas. Do you like to sleep at night? Because I kind of do."

Oh, I'm making him sound like a weirdo. He's not.

* * *

I miss Andrew so much. Yesterday I was having a bad day about him. Finally Erik (Poor Erik, I study with him and that means he has had to listen to all my emotional outbursts about Andrew for the past three weeks.) had had enough. While I was outside having a smoke, he took one of my index cards that I use to make flashcards. On the far left side, he wrote "Take him as he is," and drew a big heart and colored it in with my pink highlighter. On the far right side, he wrote, "Move on," and drew a highlighter-yellow sun with highlighter-orange rays. Then in the middle he drew a giant box, wrote the word INSANITY in the middle, and put a little X and a "You are here" underneath. He also drew broken hearts, clouds, and crying faces, and scribbled the words, "Why?" "Drama" "Groundhog Day" "What does this mean" "Expense" in the box. He left the card in my book so that I would find it when I turned the page. Funny boy. I had to admit he was right though. I am insane.